Saturday, October 31, 2009

Saliva to Thread, Sternum, and Scalp






an escapulario has snapped;
kneeling, fingers fumble, 
nimbly wishing to
fuse the broken thread
whole


traffic lights do not wait;
midday, a sedulous task:  
a tallboy and lotto;
PikNik doors swing shut and 
open in unwitting applause; 
shuffling feet miss
him.


I could offer the young vato
what I have around my
neck;  


he will soon find saliva
will not fuse
a broken escapulario.


I could offer homeboy
a hand, the repose of a 
vato’s shoulder,


or
words of advisement 
(trucha, homito.   looking at me
like that, you already know
the bulk of what there is to know).


I could offer
my scalp, stubble, salt, and 
pressed to
the slick section of his neck 
where he will dream
of others after me 


(the permanence of ink si vale),


could offer
the sternum, where he
has never felt a vato’s lips form
crisp ovals, has never felt
that crushing weight of a vato’s 
goatee inching up your spine that
first time, where 
the prick of his name enjoining
the wall of your cora is a
new thing;


could show him my own
shit, those losses and aguantos
where another’s
letters dangle atop cora flesh
and rib;


(be down.  know how to not fuck a good thing up, 
yet, know when to say fuck it and leave
that shit behind)


and then,
my own saliva 
might accept 
his own scraped scalp;  


Clown, I will learn they call him.
he will tell me it all,
and intently, I will listen; 


(can’t ever say nobody ever gave you a chance)


glistening brown, scarred, 
his scalp touching
my thigh or the flat of my belly,
a twist of the mouth 


sets that space inside him
where the
thread has broken 
ablaze 


what’s your pit’s name? he says.


Cucuy, I say.  


parking lot has emptied, a place
as vacant as my bed.


works best if you just put it on,
make a knot.


(some things, pa, can never be fixed)


I spit.  crack my neck, go slow.    

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